By Masking selfishness with empathy
Kunesikhathi sokuxoxa indaba yempilo yakho ehambelana nendaba esake yaxoxwa umngani othile. Isibonelo, ukhulume ngokugwema ingozi ethile ekusale kancane ukuba yenzeke kulelisonto, bese nami ngixoxa ngento efanayo eyenzeka ekuqaleni konyaka. Kulungile lokho. Yingxoxo yobungani, ekhombisa ukuthi ube nesineke sokulale indaba yabo nokuthi uyafisa bazi nangeyakho indaba.
Kodwa kwesinye isikhathi lento iwukuzicabengela wena. Kwesinye isikhathi ayikhombisi ukuba nendaba nomunye. Isibonelo, mhlawumbe uxoxe indaba yobunzima obhekene nabo njengamanje bekhanda elinkenkethayo, bese ngiyaphendula ngithi “Ya, nami nganginalo ngenyanga edlule’, ngeke uzwe engathi kubekhona ukuzwelana nawe. Kukhona kona ukuqonda nokuba nendaba, kodwa akusikona ukuba nozwela. Ukuba nozwela kungaba wukucabanga ngalokho okwakwehlela, kodwa bese usebenzisa lolo lwazi ukukhuluma amazwi enduduzo. Esikhundleni sokukhuluma ngokwehlela wena, ngimelwe ukusebenzisa okwangehlela ukukhomibsa uthando nokunakekela. “Ya, nami nganginalo ngenyanga edlule” yimpendulo ekhuthazwa yilokho okwakwehlela, kodwa “ Ncese, kwaze kwakubi, othi ngikutholele indawo ethule engenawo umsindo” lokhu wuzwelo olukhuthazwa yilokho okwakwehlela.
Yize noma uPawuli wayebhala ngokududza labo ababehluphekile ngenxa kaKhristu, umgomo wokusebenzisa izinhlupheko zakho ukududuza abanye uchazwe ngokucacile ekunakekeleni kwakhe amakholwa ayebhekene nobunzima.
Makabongwe uNkulunkulu uYise weNkosi yethu uJesu Khristu, uYise wobubele bonke, uNkulunkulu wenduduzo yonke, osiduduzayo osizini lwethu lonke, ukuze nathi sibe namandla okududuza abasosizini, noma ngabe lunjani, ngenduduzo esiduduzwe ngayo nathi nguNkulunkulu.
2KwabaseKhorinte1:3-4
Kwivesi ellingezansi uvesi 6, uPawuli uchaza ukuthi akusikho kuphela ukuthi induduzo ayithola iwumhlahlandlela ekududuzeni abanye, kodwa ngisho nokuhlupheka kwakhe kwasesetshenziswa ukubaduduza.
Kepha noma sikhathazwa manje, kungenxa yokududuzwa nokusindiswa kwenu; uma siduduzwa, kungenxa yokududuzwa kwenu okuveza ukubekezela ezinhluphekweni ezifanayo nalezi esihlupheka ngazo nathi.
2 KwabaseKhorinte1:6
Ngamanye amazwi, ngesikhathi uPawuli ebona abanye behlupheka ngendlela efanayo naleyo eyenzeka kuye, akazange abakhombe kokwakhe ukuhlupheka engathi lokho yikona okuzoba siza. Kunalokho, wabakhomba kwinduduzo ayeyitholile naye ekuhluphekeni kwakhe.
Ukuxoxelana izindaba sokuhlupheka kungagcina sekuba yindlela yokukhombisa uzwela yokuzicabangela wena, kodwa ukwabelana ngenduduzo yikona okuwukuzwelana kweqiniso. Ukukubeka ngokungagudli iguma, ukusebenzisa izinhlupheko zomunye ukukhuluma ngezakho kuyindlela yokubanobugovu engenalo uzwela, yize mhlawumbe igqugquzelwa ukuba nendaba kokuzenzisa. Kodwa mhlawumbe ukusebenzisa ukuhlupheka kwakho ukududuza labo abahluphekile kuwuthando lweqiniso.
Mangezansi nencwadi yesi-2 kwabaseKhorinte uPawuli uyayichaza imininingwane yokuhlupheka kwakhe ( 2 kwabseKhorinte 1:8-10), kodwa ngalesosikhathi inhloso isishintshile. UPawuli wayengasagxilile ekubanikezeleni induduzo, kodwa kunalokho wayesebacela ukuba bamkhulekele (2 kwabaseKhorinte 1:11). Lolushintsho kulenhloso luyasikhanyisela kakhulu. Ngesikhathi umuntu ebhekene nobunzima ngendlela efana naleyo eyakwenzekela, mhlawumbe futhi usabhekene nabo, ubunzima, lapho-ke, baduduze ngenduduzo oyitholile, kodwa ungabe usuwenza indaba ibe ngolwakho udaba. Kodwa-ke, uma ngempela nawe usebunzimeni, nawe, ngemuva kokuba ubaduduzile bona, cela kubona ukuba bakukhulekele nawe.
Uma abanye besebunzimeni, baduduze ngendlela nawe owaduduzwa ngayo. Uma ubhekene nobunzima, cela umkhuleko. Uma nibhekene nobunzima kanye kanye, baduduze wena kuqala, bese usuzicelela nawe umkhuleko.